Free from One, Bound by Another.
“So ever since I’ve been newly single, I have started to spend more and more time with this girl I used to be friends with. I met her through two of my friends who are lesbians. Not all the way openly, but they date and have for about two years.”
I asked a girl, in her early twenties, if she wouldn’t mind participating in this whole discovery process of finding out what people are holding back and why. I allowed her the time to write down what she said had been weighing a little heavy on her mind, and she gave information on her recent break up with her boyfriend and the result of her initial feelings of sadness, but resulted sense of freedom.
She mentioned the fact that she met this girl while her and her, now, ex-boyfriend were in a relationship. They would hang out as a group, the couple, the girl, and the friends. She always had an interest and attraction to the girl, but never really pursued it.
Since the break-up, she has decided to open herself up to seeing what this girl is about.
“We’ve been texting and talking every day for the last two weeks and going to the bar with our friend almost every night. I told her I liked her, and she took it well. She acted like she felt the same way, so I became really interested.”
She also states that there is a bit of hesitation with the girl wanting to make anything official. The girl is going out of the country in a few months, and doesn’t want to leave anyone behind.
“I still like her so much. Like I would be her girlfriend openly. I want her to stop being so scared though. It could be great.”
It is interesting that she mentions that she wants the girl to stop being so scared because I don’t believe that the girl is the only want with reservations. The fact that she has decided to reveal this portion of information as something that weighs heavy, something that she has been holding in, shows that there is some sort of concern, or doubt — there is some reason as to why she is holding this in.
With this, and the fact that the two friends who introduced her and this girl are not completely openly dating, it raises the questions of why there is any hesitation. Why have they been dating, “secretly” for two years? Why is there this sort of unwillingness to be completely open?